Movie Review City!

To commemorate the start of the summer movie season (I will probably (finally) go see Spider-Man tomorrow), I bring you a repository of movies reviews of movies I saw in the last couple of weeks since the last time I wrote a review, that I never got around to put into my blog. Let the summer movie season begin:

--Movie Review: Blade II: 2.5 Denstars (out of 5)
About Mr. Passenger 57 himself and his battle against a horde of super vampires. This was a lame and boring sequel to the much more superior original. How is it the main vampire group sent to help Blade are a) AWESOME fighters with swords, but take the swords away for the rest of the movie and give them guns, and they SUCK!; and b) a team who trained to for a couple of years to hunt down Blade, only defeated in one nite! Agggggggggrrrr! Okay, the main chick in the movie was hot and some of the CG "vampire wrestling" part was cool but it still suck.

--Movie Review: Panic Room: 2 Denstars (out of 5)
About Jodie Foster and her battle against the "panic room" she is locked in, and the burgars outside it. Boy, I was REALLY disappointed with this movie. I really wanted to like this movie because the trailers I saw looked awesome and creepy and terrifying and ITS A DAVID FINCHER MOVIE (and I like Forrest Whitaker)! It was just plain boring. No really suspense, no real terror. It didn't have any of those "Oh no, dont go there!" moments in which this type of movies SCREAMS it should have! I have to admit that the Dwight Yoakam was really good in the movie...cool, calm and totally unrecognizable with the mask, chaotic, angry and psychoic without it! And of course, those Fincher-esq CG cameras. And lets now forget that we get to see Jodie Foster pee in this movie! YEAH! Hmmmm...I wonder how that scene came to be...hmmmm...:

David Fincher: Alright Jodie...in this scene I want you to sit on that toilet and pee for me...
Jodie Foster: ...
David Fincher: But when you pee...I dont want you to aim into the water. Try to "blast" the porcein so we can really hear you pee...
Jodie Foster: uhm...
David Fincher: and ACTION!

--Movie Review: Ocean's Eleven (in flight movie version): 4 Denstars (out of 5)
About a group of "11"guys and their battle to steal from a major casino in Las Vegas. I saw this movie on a plane back to Toronto so I was a captive audience but I really enjoyed this movie. I guess its something to do with heist films and their incredibly elaborate plans, but this movie's plan went a little TOO well to be believable. Oh well...but it was still a fun movie to watch with some great characters. I would really like to see this movie again, but in its normal, unedited form. And I wouldn't mind seeing the original one too.

--Movie Review: Death to Smoochy: 3 Denstars (out of 5)
About a "goodie two-shoes" children's TV star (Edward Norton) and his battle against the networks, the mob and a former children's TV star (Robin Williams). This was a movie I saw while in Toronto when we had nothing else better to do and nothing else was on to watch either. Needless to say, it was an okay movie, with a lot of drag on in parts of this movie. Both Edward Norton and Robin Williams were great (especially Robin Williams when he gets to do "dirty" improv) and that Katherine Keener, boy does she look and act a lot like one of our secretaries from work. Just ask anyone at work who saw Being John Malkovich. Oh, and lets not forget the Elvis Stojka's choreographed skating sequence ending!

--Movie Review: Shiri: 3 Denstars (out of 5)
About 2 South Korean cops and their battle against a sexy but deadly North Korean female assasin! This was the "breakout" film that helped put Korea into the high production, action movie scene (as well as broke the box office record in Korea, set by Titanic). It was an alright kind of movie, with a such a OBVIOUS twist in the movie, that was SOOOO obvious that I couldn't believe it was until I saw it. And this twist in the movie, isn't even one of those clever twist where you can watch the movie again and realized it was suppose to be like that all the time. All I will say is that Koreans sure know how to make one violently bloodly movie with a sappy love story thrown in. I look forward seeing more movies from Korea, but without the obvious twist. Check it out. It should be on DVD.

--Movie Review: Kate & Leopold (in flight movie version): 3.5 Denstars (out of 5)
About a man (Hugh Jackman) from the 1870s who is brought in our present time and his battle to fit into 21st century while trying to woo this chick (Meg Ryan). Another "captive audience" (plane ride back to SD) movie and yes, I did like it. I just couldn't stop watching it! I just found the Hugh Jackman character so interesting, and after seeing this movie, I think he is a wonderful actor. Plus I am a sucker for time traveling movies, I guess. A chick flick definately but a guilty pleasure for me. Now, excuse me while I go watch some hockey! :)

--Movie Review: Freddy Got Fingered: 1 Denstars (out of 5)
About Tom Green and his battle to continue to shock everyone who see his work! I grew up watching Tom Green in Canada (before MTV) and I always wanted to watch this movie but never got around it until I saw it on my DirecTV. And boy, am I glad I didn't pay movie to see this movie. This movie was REALLY bad. Its pretty much all his "streeter", annoy ppl comedy put into a movie form and throw in some really tasteless gross out bits. Less really funny parts, more disgusting parts that really push the limits of what can or should be shown. It was like a train wreckless in which I couldnt stop watching no matter how bad it was. But as horrible this movie is, there has never been anything like it, and for that, Tom Green has done it again.

--Movie Review: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back: 3.5 Denstars (out of 5)
About Jay and Silent Bob and their battle against Hollywood and internet geeks alike! I am a big Kevin Smith fan but I think this is his worst movie so far (okay...running neck to neck with Dogma). I really wanted to like this movie and though, it entertained me and there were some great clever moments, it just wasn't as fun as I wanted to be. Too me, I think Kevin Smith is just trying WAY too hard to do a movie that makes fun of itself. Its almost like Kevin Smith doesn't know what to do when he has a big budget or something. Recommended to those who like Kevin Smith movies or those who are movie geeks like me (though most Kevin Smith fans ARE movie geeks!)

Damn...I watch a lot of movies!